From the pen of Turlough Ó Maoláin ...

The Chronicles of Bulgaria

Baby Love ... for Freya


In the very early hours of this morning my firstborn child gave birth to her own firstborn child. So now in our family I am delighted to say that we have a second firstborn child.

To be a bit more precise, it was at 2:59 a.m. Stockport Time (which is 4:59 a.m. Malki Chiflik Time), that my dear son-in-law, by means of his portable telephone apparatus, announced to the world the birth of Baby Freya. This brought great joy as, in addition to the arrival of a gorgeous baby, there was the feeling of relief that mother, father and daughter were all well and that the anxiety of the days leading up to the point where the uterus would be vacated were over. Moving out is always a stressful experience, no matter where you have been living. I had been checking my phone for messages at least once an hour throughout the night and the preceding three days. In fact, since shortly after the moment of conception my preoccupation with childbirth announcements had intensified a thousand fold and to the extent that it was necessary for my exhausted old phone to be replaced with a new one in November which, in human gestation terms, was halftime.      


The first picture of you. The first picture of Freya.

The first picture of you. The first picture of Freya.  


It’s great when you get to my colossal number of years old to be able to say that you’ve just experienced something for the first time in your life, especially when that something is a firstborn grandchild. I had always hoped that when I’m sixty-four (a stage of my life that is only a matter of months away) I would have grandchildren on my knee, just like Paul McCartney. Under the circumstances Vera, Chuck and Dave would have been nice, though Freya is a lovely name. Freya as a girl's name is of Scandinavian origin meaning ‘noble lady’. In Norse mythology, Freya was the goddess of love and fertility. And really, Freya, Chuck and Dave wouldn’t be far out from what Macca was singing.

What makes the arrival of this lovely little miracle even more lovely and miraculous is that she is so much like me. She has very little hair on her head and is unable to stand up or walk in a straight line. She has no control over emissions from either end of her digestive system. She makes a noise when she’s hungry and has expressed no interest in watching The X Factor on telly. The big difference is that I am more adept at the Bulgarian language than she is, though the way kids are today I expect that by следващата седмица (the Bulgarian words for ‘next week’, pronounced as sledvashtata sedmeetsa) she will have reached my standard.

A long time ago I was a firstborn child myself. Back then we didn’t have mobile phones, or even ordinary phones to spread the news, so some people have only recently become aware of my existence. Transport facilities were quite primitive so no one ever travelled as far afield as Bulgaria, or even Stockport for that matter. Thomas the Tank Engine was barely a twinkle in Reverend Wilbert Awdry’s eye and the concept of Peppa Pig would have been considered far too futuristic for the eyes and ears of little ones. It was so long ago that the number one song in the British record charts in the week of my birth was That’ll Be the Day by Buddy Holly & the Crickets. The number one song in the British record charts today is Montero (Call Me By Your Name) by Lil Nas X but, although this is currently my favourite karaoke song, it’s the tune of Baby Love by The Supremes that’s been rattling around in my head since just before daybreak today.

Welcome to the world lovely little Freya. I’m sure we’re all going to have a great time together.

Stacks and stacks of love from your new Granda. xxx

Number of comments: 3

08/04/2021 10:09:32 - Trich, E-mail address is hidden

Congratulations Grandad, welcome to the new world of grandchildren. Ours bring us such a lot of pleasure ( and stress at times) but we love it. I hope you get to meet baby Freya very soon xx

08/04/2021 10:34:14 - Del, E-mail address is hidden

Congratulations gramps!

28/04/2021 10:08:18 - Jennifer, E-mail address is hidden

Hi Vo-võ ( granma is vo,vó)) I was just rereading this and enjoying it all over again,Another little gem thanks
Hope there is something being penned other than you in the house bu snowstorm or digestive disorders,
Alternatively, ., I hope I am still on your circulation list. J(flower)
:) :( :D ;) :| :P |-) (inlove) :O ;( :@ 8-) :S (flower) (heart) (star)